The Scrawl Vol. 1, No. 48

Soaking in the sunshine and springy breezes and sharing some yoghurt. Being in the front yard is tricky, because Maria still isn’t trained for yards without fences, and said training takes a lot of energy (that I don’t have right now). We kept our outdoor play short this time.

Haven’t made green smoothies since I was battling anemia late in the pregnancy with M, but I’ve been struggling with eating salad recently, and I need my greens, so I had Hailie blend some up for us. Maria thought they were the greatest invention since cream cheese.

I find myself much more tender hearted in some ways while pregnant. I melt with tears of compassion at the sorrows of others, and am constantly reminded while caring for Maria of the many blessings I have as her mother that others cannot share. In the normal scheme of things, I block these emotions and reminders out. My own grief over the death of my younger brother is often too great for me to bear, and crying renders me far less capable of normal tasks, so I push it under. But when I harden my heart to my own grief, compassion for the grief of others is much more difficult to come by. So I welcome this irresistible tenderness, and hope that the many tears I shed each day may wear away the stony crust of my heart.

Trying to beat the heat together. She was delighted that I was taking selfies of us, but then when I thought she was asking for another…

…she said this. Probably only the fourth picture I’ve ever take of her fussing, so I don’t feel too guilty about it.

There is finally so much green everywhere. We’re soaking it in.

Watermelon and a fenced back yard. We’re ready for you, summer. Well, Maria is. I wouldn’t mind if you waited for the second trimester.


Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )


Connecting to %s