Soaking in the sunshine and springy breezes and sharing some yoghurt. Being in the front yard is tricky, because Maria still isn’t trained for yards without fences, and said training takes a lot of energy (that I don’t have right now). We kept our outdoor play short this time.
Haven’t made green smoothies since I was battling anemia late in the pregnancy with M, but I’ve been struggling with eating salad recently, and I need my greens, so I had Hailie blend some up for us. Maria thought they were the greatest invention since cream cheese.
I find myself much more tender hearted in some ways while pregnant. I melt with tears of compassion at the sorrows of others, and am constantly reminded while caring for Maria of the many blessings I have as her mother that others cannot share. In the normal scheme of things, I block these emotions and reminders out. My own grief over the death of my younger brother is often too great for me to bear, and crying renders me far less capable of normal tasks, so I push it under. But when I harden my heart to my own grief, compassion for the grief of others is much more difficult to come by. So I welcome this irresistible tenderness, and hope that the many tears I shed each day may wear away the stony crust of my heart.